Do you suffer from Nazism? Check the warning signs:

Have you ever doodled swastikas… all over a Jewish burial ground?
Is there a copy of Mein Kampf on your coffee table?
Do you own a collection of German WWII “memorabilia” that was “passed down” to you from your “grandfather”?
Have you ever felt that the History channel’s depictions of WWII were inaccurate, biased, and/or unfair?
Does the name Oscar Schindler make you angry?
Have you ever referred to Germany as “the motherland”, without being of German descent?
Do you often experience an intense, irrational dislike of Jews, Jehovah’s Witnesses, the disabled, Freemasons, Poles, and homosexuals that persists for more than two hours?
Do you get sexually aroused by scenes from the Holocaust?

If you answered YES to any of these questions, contact a therapist immediately. It is very likely that you have an acute case of Nazism.

If someone you know is displaying these symptoms, under no circumstances should you marry this person, have sex with this person, or engage this person in any sort of meaningful dialogue. If you have had prior sexual contact with someone exhibiting acute Nazism, clean yourself thoroughly with bleach and hot water and contact a therapist immediately.